Lethargy?

When Kathy was leaving our house yesterday, I remember saying in an offhand manner, "I have NO idea why Nikko is acting this way, and that's pretty sad coming from the person that is supposed to know him the best." It saddens me to think that I can't figure out why Nikko is having these emotional roller coasters. I feel really helpless when Nikko throws himself onto the floor and drags a pillow over his head, or puts his head into a storage bin. He's been having these moments again this past week. The odd thing is after lunch today I saw him getting sleepy on the couch. This was alarming because we were 20 minutes away from putting on shoes and waiting for the school bus. I put Audrey down for a nap and went back to check on Nikko. He was drowsy, hunched over and crying. I wondered if he had a tummy ache, but he didn't push me away when I pressed on his stomach. He seemed distressed, upset that he wasn't able to fall completely asleep, and anxious. I wrote a quick note to his teachers that Nikko wasn't quite himself today. When the bus came trundling down the street, Ronin and I ran to the driveway but Nikko ambled slowly on the brick pavers. He was also slow getting into his seat, but no tears. Nikko was fine getting off the bus at the end of the day. Both boys had fallen asleep on the bus and I don't blame them since the ride is long. The school is actually ten minutes away, but when the kids ride the bus it takes them an average 25 minutes. In the evening we had dinner at the in-laws and all the kids had fun playing with their cousins. Nikko ate some of the chicken nuggets at dinner but only ate the breaded coating. Ronin had been running around a lot after dinner and I feared that he might throw up his dinner if he continued to climb the furniture and run around recklessly. Denis got a big purple bowl and put it nearby in case Ronin had to throw up. Nikko immediately adopted the bowl and started putting his face into it, much like how he put his head in a storage bin under the kitchen table at home. He abandoned it for a while and Audrey and Maya picked it up, pretending to eat cereal from it. After Nikko took a bath, he commandeered the bowl back and wouldn't return it to Lola. We didn't fight him to return it so it's currently in the back of our Pilot.

iFuture, more moodiness

I have noticed that a lot of moms with ASD kids have iPhones or DS Lites (or an iPad) and they let their kid use it to watch Youtube videos or play games or even use educational-based apps, to keep them occupied when things are crazy around them or as a reward for being good. Nikko's not at that stage yet, but I wonder if this is a direction that we will have to take in his future. Or is it a technology gimmick that will prevent Nikko from actually behaving in public of his own recognizance? Or is it a necessary tool because Nikko just can't seem to be able to calm down his anxieties or keep from obsessively wanting lollipops when we're at the store?

From the get go this morning Nikko was in full whiny mode and I don't know why. He was whining for a cheese sandwich for breakfast and just. Did. Not. Stop. He continued to whine throughout the morning. I heard him whine and cry with Kathy during ABA. We discussed his behavior and I wondered if he was slightly constipated. Yesterday he had some pb (pb = peanut butter)smears but nothing huge. For the past three days I have lessened the MiraLAX to just a coating at the bottom of a cap. A few times today I came into the living room and thought Nikko may have been straining. I'd also smell poop, but when I checked on Nikko there was nothing. I wondered if he was feeling uncomfortable again and was the poop starting to back up. I increased the MiraLAX in his lunch juice after talking to Kathy and it may have helped him push out some poop later in the afternoon. Am I doomed, then, to this smeary pb poop until he matures a little more in age? Dr. Santiago didn't seem to mind that we were using MiraLAX and even encouraged it over using a suppository. I wonder if Nikko's whininess is correlated to getting constipated again. I hate this vicious circle.

Audrey napped in the afternoon and when she woke up, I snacked everyone and got us ready to run errands. My plan was to go to Costco and Target. We arrived at Costco and everyone seemed to start out on the right foot. Suddenly, Audrey said, "Lollipop?" I told her I didn't have anymore, sorry. She continued to ask for a lollipop and I kept refusing her lightly. Then Nikko entered whine mode and was tugging at my purse. He was also pushing the cart astray. Meanwhile, Audrey was getting angrier that I wasn't giving her anything so her cries for lollipop got louder and LOUDER. Coupled with Nikko's screechy whining, I think we were making a lot of noise and I wanted the ground to open and swallow me up. Audrey's screams for a lollipop were not lessening despite me giving her the evil eye and hissing for her to be quiet. I managed to get us through the self-checkout line but saw that Nikko was walking on the side of the cart that faced the cafeteria. He was going to want to eat there, no matter how quickly I was pushing the cart away. Nikko started whining loudly again as we flew past the cafeteria seating. I got to the guy who checks our receipts on the way out and Nikko was violently pushing the cart sideways in anger. We walked outside and Nikko started to give some strong, blood-curdling screams. Thankfully he kept walking besides the cart and didn't bolt back toward the store. I put him in his seat first, dried his eyes and tried to give him a little compassion. Audrey stopped screaming for lollipops when she looked up at the TV screen and saw Hi-5. Throughout this whole ordeal, Ronin was my well-behaved angel. Once in the Pilot he started saying that we were going to Target. I told Ronin no, I don't think we're going to Target because I can't handle Nikko and Audrey's screaming anymore. It would be too much. We were going home. Ronin was starting to get whiny, not wanting to go home, when I suggested that we go for a walk to look for trains instead. That idea helped. After unloading the groceries, we walked to our train spot and started - well, trainspotting. Later, dinner was uncomplicated and it was bath and bedtime.

Tomorrow I have a dental appointment at 8:30a, but it won't be until the boys are at school that I attempt to return to Target. I also have to go to the bank to straighten out a dormant checking account, then register for the Passport To Fitness pass at the Rec Plexx, and THEN go to Target.

Scissors

Nikko's OT report - Obstacle Course, followed sequence well. Pounding tee's for strengthening. Then worked on cutting with regular scissors. At the end was able to open scissors & snip.

Awesome!
It looks like from his report, Nikko is going over shapes, and that's good because Jenna tells me that he is good at shapes during ABA. The kids are also learning about cleaning up. At home, we're trying to get the kids into a routine of cleaning up before bath time. It's just hard to enforce it when it gets really close to bath time. When the boys were off to school today and Audrey was napping, I started rummaging around the house for items to contribute to Tristan's garage sale sponsored by the Glenbrook South High School Marching Band. I ended up including a big rocking horse on springs (from the neighbors), a ride-on horse toy that I kept bumping into every time I rounded a corner, thus scraping the skin off my toes, two booster chairs, two baby walkers, a rubbermaid full of preschool toys, a bottle warmer, bottle dishrack, portable booster chair, and a water fountain feature. Despite all the things that I got packed into the back of the Pilot, it STILL didn't look like I made a dent in this house. I went to Atz's house after my pilates class. At home, the kids romped around with Denis but Ronin's tummy wasn't having a great night so he upchucked his dinner downstairs. He had an early night along with Audrey. Tomorrow there is no school, but Nikko will have ABA at 10a.

Labor Day weekend wrap-up

Saturday was chilly but it didn't stop us from packing up lunch and going to Graue Mill in Oak Brook for a little hike. There was a civil war demonstration taking place but we didn't stop to peruse the displays. The kids enjoyed looking at the river which ran parallel to our path. We left to go have a picnic at the Oak Brook Park District Park, which had a vast array of playground areas and soccer fields. We were there for three hours, finishing lunch and then taking a few kites out for a sail. The kids were able to amuse themselves by running around the fields, getting tangled in the soccer goal nets, and running back and forth along benches. The kids were conked out in the car on the way home. Our dinner plans were to celebrate Chinny and Denis' birthday at Fuddrucker's. The kids were happy to hang out with their cousins, although Nikko shadowed me every time I left the vicinity. He didn't have any anxious meltdowns, however. It was a fun time and I actually got to eat a little more dinner than I usually do when we go out.

Sunday was warmer but the excursions from yesterday left us slightly drained and not as energetic to leave the house in the morning. We were also anticipating the afternoon when Tristan would come over to mow the lawn, and then we would all go to the Penepacker's house so the kids could stay and play/eat while Denis and I went to a movie and dinner to celebrate our 7th wedding anniversary. I heard that Nikko cried for two minutes when we left, but when the Penepackers told him they were going to the park, he was suddenly agreeable. The kids all played in the sand and got baths afterward. When we returned from dinner, all three kids were in the basement watching Disney's Cars and in good moods. The only caveat was that Ronin and Audrey were scared of the dogs. Otherwise, it was a very successful night and I am so beholden to my sister and her family for their generous offer of time.

Monday was Labor Day and to cap off the good weather we took the kids to another off-the-beaten-path park that was next door to a Menard's. The playground apparatus seemed to be connected into one giant obstacle course which challenged the gross motor skills of all the kids. We also brought along a frisbee and played a little Monkey In The Middle with the kids.

Tuesday [today] school was on the agenda again. I had been dreading the putting on of socks and shoes because Nikko had refused to wear the new gym shoes I got for him. I had frantically searched online for an identical pair of orange-and-navy shoes from Target but they no longer carry it in his size. But for some reason before bathtime, Nikko let me put on his new shoes (the tongue had lights that flashed when you stepped hard on the ground) and he seemed pleased enough to go look at his shoes in a mirror in our dark bedroom. On Tuesday morning he was just a little confused when it was time to put on socks and shoes but again he allowed the new shoes to be worn and I was just plain old relieved. His size 11's were really getting worn out so a size 12 was in order. If only it were going to be this easy when it's time to get his winter boots on. Nikko was in a good mood during therapy with Kathy today but did have a few mood swings again. I expected a better performance because it was at 10a instead of 4:45p, like it will be tomorrow. Nikko has also been getting whiny with me for not giving him snacks that he requests. I literally have to show him the last bits of snack and then the empty box as a result in order for him to understand that there is no more.

Not *as* late / behavior watch

Today the bus was only fifteen minutes late arriving at our house. We boarded the bus and there were three adults total again: the driver, a lady in the front seat, and one flanking the back of the bus. She came up and ushered us to a seat on the right side of the bus (facing the back). Nikko instantly started to whine and refused to get in because he is used to sitting on the left side of the bus near the window. Thankfully the lady didn't object to me suggesting that the boys take a left side seat. I buckled Nikko next to the window while Ronin sat waiting for his turn and yelling in my ear, "Good bye, Daddy!" while waving frantically out the window. Once the boys were off, the rest of us went to Woodfield Mall to browse while Denis was getting the oil changed in the Pilot. I remarked to Denis that this was the first time we travelled alone with Audrey in the back, like having one kid all over again. Audrey was talkative until she fell asleep, then woke up completely when we got to Macy's. Overall, she was a good sport during our trip to the mall. Unfortunately, the car wasn't quite ready by 3:30 so I had to take a cab home in order to meet the boys when the bus dropped them off. The bus was fifteen minutes late, a 50% improvement from yesterday. When I got on the bus, Nikko was asleep but Ronin was awake. After we came inside I noticed that Ronin had scraped his right leg below the knee. It looked like he got a little mauled and unfortunately he couldn't quite tell me when it happened. "It happened in the driveway," was all I really got from him. I didn't know if it happened at school, but after considering the options and leaving an email for his teacher, I figured that he may have scraped his leg when stepping off the bus. There was no dirt or debris in the cuts, and the lines were parallel, similar to the grid of the bus steps. I felt really bad because he didn't cry out in pain, or if he did then I totally missed it. I put Neosporin on the cuts and will continue for a few days.

I'm keeping an eye on Nikko's behavior. He hasn't totally been under the kitchen table the last two days as he has in the last two weeks, but he's still pretty whiny. I wonder if he is this whiny at school when he can't communicate what he wants. He also hasn't had any emotional outbursts (that weren't provoked by Ronin pushing him, or me getting irritated at him in a mean tone of voice, sorry to say) so I wonder if going back to school is impacting his behavior. I can tell that school is impacting Ronin's behavior, however, because the past two nights after he came home he's been a mixture of happy and bossy and easily irritable. Tonight was a prime example of Ronin sounding tired and cranky, refusing to eat anything but grapes for dinner, refusing to watch Mickey Mouse Clubhouse instead of Blues Clues, refusing to let Nikko read his Roadwork book. I've heard that many kids need to decompress after coming home from school, or that at school they spend the time in a somewhat anxious state, expending energy to be obedient, sit still and learn, and then when they come home they will let all hell break loose. Well, that's what's happening with Ronin. We were watching Thomas after their snack and I thought that was pretty calming, but the attitude came around dinnertime. Tomorrow we will be going on an outing to a nature center at Ty Warner Park. We'll bring a picnic lunch again, but this time there will be jeans and sleeves on the kids because the temperatures will be in the high 60's. It's a drastic change from the 80's/90's of last week. Then we'll meet up with the rest of the Alog family to celebrate Chinny and Denis' birthdays.

1st Day of School

Wednesday - This was the Westbrook Garden Walk aka open house. I had planned to leave the house early to pick up some forms from the ped's office but somehow my cushion of time got eaten away with longer diaper changes and me forgetting the tuition check so I had to turn around. Grrr. I pulled up to the school right at 2:30p and luckily Denis had already arrived from work and came over to help unload the kids. We picked up some papers in the office and headed to Nikko's classroom but had to stop by the transportation table first. It was a new bus company called Grand Transit that was handling the routes this year. We had to fit Nikko with a harness in the event that his bus did not have five-point harnesses built into the seats (an older bus). Walking into Nikko's classroom was like a sigh of relief and I enjoyed seeing his teachers and their aides. Much like last year, Nikko would not look up long enough to have his picture taken and we spent a while trying to coax him. After signing up for November's parent/teacher conference we had to shuffle next door to meet Ronin's teachers, Mrs. Russell and Mrs. Hirsch. Ronin was playing with some trucks and the other two kids were wandering while I discussed Ronin's allergy plan with Mrs. Hirsch. More forms, another P/T conference date, and we were good to go. Ronin didn't seem too talkative and Nikko didn't act like he recognized any of his teachers. Audrey was very explorative and didn't complain one bit. Everything seemed to be in place except for the bus situation. The supervisor told me that they would call us in the evening for our route # and time of pickup. At 9pm I was told that the route was #18 and pickup time was 1:00p. I worked on a to-do list while filling out forms and fact sheets on the boys including putting diapers, labelled changes of clothing, and snacks for Ronin into their backpacks.

Thursday - 1st Day of School
My routine today, and every Tuesday-Friday will be this:
11:30 - Lunch
12:30 - Change clothes and diapers, and put Audrey down for a nap
12:50 - Socks & shoes, backpacks
12:55 - Go outside for bus
1:00 - Bus!

At 12:55 as we were about to walk out the door I glanced at the coat hooks and saw Nikko's harness sitting there. I scrambled to get it and started to put it on Nikko. He was angry and tried to slip his hands across his chest to get it off. I zipped it up the back and was getting frustrated with Nikko for trying to defeat the harness. While keeping an eye on the door I quickly snapped some pictures of the boys and then shoved us out into the remnant rain. Denis came home, thankfully again, and he kept us company. The twins apparently changed to the afternoon schedule as well, so their mom walked over to us and joined us on our wait for the bus at our driveway. The bus was 20 minutes late and I expected it to be. The supervisor came out to greet us. I asked her about Nikko's harness and she told me he didn't have to wear it on the bus so I eagerly stripped it off him. Ronin got on with Denis' help and we followed them. I put Nikko next to the window just like last year, buckled him in, and then Ronin was placed next to him. Ronin didn't seem to mind being near the aisle. I was even able to take a picture of them while the twins' mom was buckling them in. There were absolutely no tears from either kid. When I got off the bus I was giving high fives to Denis and the twins' mom, doing a silly happy dance that the seats had five-point harnesses so Nikko didn't have to wear the medieval one, and that Ronin did not have a meltdown once he sat on the bus. I almost didn't care that the bus was late except for the fact that the boys would start school late. After the bus left I went out to run errands since Audrey was napping and Denis was home. I went to the ped office to drop off yet another round of forms, these in particular regarding permission for Ronin to receive Benadryl or an Epi-Pen in the event of a reaction. I went to Target to get a cubby system for the kids' shoes, to clear our foyer just a bit. Then I ran to Costco for other provisions. While checking out of Costco the ped office called to say the paperwork was ready. Great! But I wasn't ready, it was already 3:30 and too tight to pick it up before the boys came home. Too bad I didn't know ahead of time that the bus would be 35 minutes late in dropping off the kids. When I got on the bus, I introduced myself to the bus driver, whose name was Veronica. She started telling me about how the bus was going to be late these first few days, but I told her I figured it would. I think she was reacting on the safe side because the twin's mom was furious that the bus was late. Nikko and Ronin had fallen asleep, heads lurched forward and dripping with sweat because there were only a few windows open. They woke up and were slow to get off the bus, but were relatively happy. I couldn't pry much information from Ronin because he just didn't reiterate how his day went. The communication sheet was missing from Ronin's backpack so I didn't know what they did. But Nikko's sheet was there and it said: Nikko had a great day! I will send pictures later today. And they did. I am so very relieved that Ronin didn't have any separation anxiety, wasn't scared of climbing onto the bus for the first time ever, and didn't complain about school. He stated that he had Triscuts for snack and was pretty thrilled. I put a box of it in his backpack since I have to supply his snacktime food. I'm sure the busses will be late again tomorrow, but I just hope they will be "less" late than today. I noticed in the three pictures emailed to me that in Nikko's class I saw two kids from his morning session, Dougyoung and Sofie. I'm glad that there are some familiar faces in the afternoon.

Pool and Thomas

I didn't have plans to leave the house today until Denis called to suggest that we meet up with the Creens after work at Meadows Pool for a 6-8p family swim. That ended up being the highlight of the kids' day. Nikko was ecstatic, holding two plastic fishes that he brought from home, and lunging into the water leading with his head. Unfortunately the lifeguard blew his/her whistle at me three separate times for silly infractions: we brought plastic buckets to fill with water, like last time, but today they said it wasn't allowed. I was swinging Audrey back and forth in the water and the lifeguard said it was too high. Finally, Ronin and Audrey were standing on a cement block on the lawn waiting for me to finish packing up our gear when a lifeguard blew the whistle for them to get off. Geez! Three-peat offender!

I handled one thing this morning that could have gone sour. Nikko approached me at 7:15a with the Thomas DVD. I really don't like turning on the TV before breakfast, since it's on most of the day afterward, so I told Nikko to wait. Of course he didn't want to and kept pushing and whining at me to move toward the TV. I turned the tables on him and made it an exercise in asking for permission. I wanted him to ask, "I want to watch Thomas please" or "I want watch Thomas" or any derivative thereof. Nikko caught on that I was trying to make him ask properly and staunchly refused at first. He was screaming and whining, thrashing on the floor and throwing himself into a pillow on the couch because he didn't want to obey my request. He could see that I was unrelenting and he must have really wanted to watch Thomas because he rushed saying, "I want Thomas please" and dove screaming into the couch. I didn't have as much success when I tried to get him to say, "Thomas is on TV" so I accepted what he told me and put on the movie. Instantly, calm. Go figure. I tried so hard not to lose my temper this morning and it paid off.