Friday, March 20, 2009

Looking for a nanny again

What a tough day. A lot of things need ruminating about. First and foremost, I will probably have to let Brianna, our sitter, go. She is just not comfortable taking care of 5-month old Audrey. She doesn't know how to soothe her when she goes ballistic and it has visibly shaken her. Last week after I went to the chiro I walked into the door and she said, "Thank GOD you're back!" This was because Audrey woke up from a nap and didn't take her bottle well. She cried hysterically and Brianna didn't know how to calm her. Audrey cried herself back to sleep, so maybe she just needed a longer nap. The second, telling incident happened today, unfortunately. Nikko and I went to playgroup between 9:45-11:15, back by 11:30. When I walked in the door, Brianna didn't look so hot. She said that Audrey had acted up again, she didn't know what to do, and was so annoyed by the crying that she had to call her mom to talk to her. Eventually Audrey cried herself into her nap in the pack n' play coz Brianna didn't know how else to calm her. This made the rest of the day kind of uncomfortable for me, and when I broached it at the end of the day to see if she had any ideas how we could make this a win-win situation (as Shelly put it) Brianna said that she was plagued all day w/problems w/her parents and hadn't thought about the Audrey situation at all. That wasn't comforting to me, but I let it drop and told myself that this situation will have to get resolved before next week. I can't have someone working for me that probably fears coming to my house, or doesn't like taking care of one of my kids, or doesn't have the patience to care for the screaming baby. I realize that I, myself, am often at my wit's end when I hear Audrey screaming and both boys are whining and tugging at my pantleg, but I have to deal with it because they are my kids. I could REALLY use earplugs! It's hard on anybody to take care of all three kids when they are acting up, but that is why I was paying her... plus, she only had 2 kids for 1.5 hours. It's just that one of them was the screaming one. I need to find someone with more experience, as Luisa told me.

This is all relevant because it now affects how I am going to handle therapies through searching for another babysitter/temporary nanny. If I let Brianna go now, I will basically have no guaranteed help during Nikko's therapies until I can find help or get it covered by someone capable. I need:
- someone to watch Ronin while Nikko and I are going through his therapy sessions
- that someone to also, if possible, watch Audrey during this time
- make sure that the person can be flexible and meet on our designated therapy days, and possibly add time for a playgroup session
- help me take the kids to the park or outdoors in general
- go with us to the store, or go to the store in lieu of myself
- if necessary, be aware of Nikko's condition and be sensitive to it, interacting with him by playing games, reading books, puzzles, or being physically active

I started looking at an agency called, but I also have a person or two on sittercity that might be possible. I'm working on it.

As for Nikko, he started out the day being extremely velcro-like. He didn't want to leave my side, same as last week. I wonder if he stays inside for a week does he get stir-crazy in 7 days? I'd be surprised because he had opportunities to play outside lately. Guess he just wanted more comfort from me, as usual. Once we got to playgroup, however, he forgot I was there. He had a pretty good session, playing with different objects and attending to drawing with a green marker on a craft. He did it for quite a long time. But he did get antsy about 10 minutes away from snacktime. We went home and then met Bo (Bogumila Wolska), our new DT. She was very nice and was observing how Nikko played. I was not 100% sold on her, but she has good potential. Next week we will start the session by sitting at the table, then transition to the corner, instead of free play like what happened today. Finally, we had OT with Shelly. I was able to be with just Shelly and Nikko and Audrey while Ronin slept in the car with Brianna at the front. I lamented to Shelly about my situation above. Meanwhile, Nikko had some good moments and not great ones; the transitions were hard but he was able to recover from toy removal as long as Shelly replaced it with something of equal or greater value. She was happy to hear from me that Nikko seems to enjoy riding a tricycle. He has taken the tricycle in the garage and has sat on it, even put his feet into the pedals, but ends up pushing it with his feet. It's still great to see him play on it. Today, Nikko also really put his face close to mind, was touching my cheekbones and seemed to lean in to kiss me. He let me do that after prayers again. I think it's becoming purposeful now, and I think he watches when Ronin comes to give me kisses, or gives Audrey kisses.

Ok, I'm back to being stressed out now. I've got to shut down here and wash the floor so that I can get some sleep.

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