Saturday, February 27, 2010

6:30a Bloody nose / Muddy Ronin

Speech report: He was able to name without a model the whole family! Requesting bubbles, car, etc. Good today. He is just not into body parts yet.

Isn't that great? The family names, I mean. They are also working on this during ABA, so hopefully if he's bombarded by our names he'll make some real progress here. Just the other day I was trying to point out his nose and eyes, but he wasn't letting me fiddle with his face.

This morning, Nikko woke up at 6:30a and started wailing. When I got to him, Ronin had woken up from the cries and came to the door. I tried to pull him out of the room before permanently waking Audrey, but I could hear her awake when the door was closed. Nikko was very whiny and was laying in the hallway making noise so I dragged him back to the sofa area. And then I noticed that his nose was bleeding so I grabbed Kleenex and tried to put pressure on his nose. Of course he didn't like that and put up a big fight. He could probably feel the blood dripping freely down his nose so he kept wiping it across his sleeves, and then wanted to bury his head in my lap. Let's just say I had to put my pajamas in the laundry. After the bleeding subsided and he calmed down, and I wiped his face with a wet wipe, I got Audrey and tried to move forward with breakfast before school. He went, and I was wondering why he had to get us all up so early when we didn't have to be awake at 6:30a. I got into a vacuuming kick, trying to clean the rotating brushes of tangled hair. I also started shifting rubbermaid contents around because I'm determined to find a few that I can put toy in for that toy rotation. After lunchtime, I tried to rally the kids so we could go to Skokie and visit mom. I think my prep time is about 45 minutes, from diaper/clothing changes to packing the food bag to getting to the Sock and Shoes stage. Realistically. We were cutting it close because my dad leaves for work between 2:30-3p and I wanted to see him before he left. I carried Audrey to the Pilot and let Nikko and Ronin walk/run in the driveway while I put her in her carseat. Sometimes Ronin falls in the snow, no big deal. But today he fell twice, and the second time he cried out so I looked over to him and the front of his coat and jeans were coated in mud. I freaked out because I just put Audrey in the car. We could NOT go to mom's house with Ronin's muddy outfit. I told him to stand still so I could put a Hi-5 DVD in to keep Audrey company. When I finished with her and looked for Ronin, he was jumping and splashing in a muddy puddle. I was FURIOUS. I hauled him toward the house, hoping to change his clothes quickly while Audrey was watching TV. I called to Nikko to come to the house, because I couldn't leave him roaming outside alone, and he ignored me. Repeated calling did nothing, so I picked up a crying Ronin and dumped him inside, taking off his muddy shoes and stripping him of his coat and jeans. Then I booked back up the driveway and hauled Nikko by the sleeve back inside. I was in a complete tirade by now. I know it sounds like a stupid reason to be angry, that Ronin just got muddy. But my mind was racing through various scenarios: we were going to be late and miss my dad before he went to work, which disappointed me greatly. The longer I allowed Ronin to splash in the puddle, the dirtier he'd get so I had to take action fast. I chose to leave Audrey in the car because unbelting her and putting her in the house while Ronin was muddy would mean she would get muddy by him and get mad for being inside again, and Ronin would be even dirtier. I felt nervous leaving her in the car, but I left the kitchen door open wide so I could see if anyone came by, or to hear if there was a commotion, or to see if our Pilot would suddenly drive backward down the driveway, thus rendering it stolen. I couldn't leave Nikko alone and he would start to protest if I dragged him back into the house, which I did anyway. I ran to the bedroom, grabbed a spare coat and some sweatpants, and came back to dress Ronin, all the while yelling how mad I was that we'd be late, that I didn't want him splashing in puddles, why me, why why why. I literally screamed myself hoarse, damaging my throat again. I got us back in the Pilot and took off, but berated myself for having ZERO composure and wondered how I am ever going to get over being pissed off about the little things. It's my nature to look 3-5 steps ahead in any scenario... how am I supposed to change that preparedness mentality? Don't tell me to take yoga or pilates to center my chi, because I can't seem to make the time here.

We had a good time at mom's house. Mickey Mouse Clubhouse was on TV, the kids snacked, and I had a nice time chatting with mom. We left her house around 5:30p. Our night ran a bit late, but at bedtime Nikko was still awake, albeit getting tired. He was drowsy but awake when I said my good night mantra to him ("Good Night, Nikko. I love you. Go to sleep. Sleepy time. STAY IN BED. STAY IN BED. STAY IN BED."). I closed the door, expecting him to start wailing in five minutes, but it was quiet. YEA!!!

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